Journal #1 April 23, 1999

It's a gorgeous day here, Jeremy. Always makes me stand in awe of God's creativity and in wonder of how much more beautiful heaven must be! I know you are probably still amazed at the wonder of it all. I was reminded today, Lord, of the profound difference between knowing you love me and "letting" you love me. Please give Jim, Di and Amy the courage today to "let" you love them deeper. C. (a family friend)

"Better is one day..."

Journal #3 May 27, 2001

Tears on black marble
Letters traced with my fingertips
Questions with no answers
You are missed more deeply then ink can express

Toilet paper roll fights
Golfing buddies
Hugs that seem to last forever
Remembering you, Jeremy

Earth holds less...
Heaven now promises more.

Dad

I couldn't write in the journals for a very long time. I sat poised with pen in hand so many times but nothing would come. But time passed. The words did come. For those of you who are experiencing pain, the words will come for you too. The healing will happen and you are not alone. jim

Journal #2 April 23, 2000

Happy Easter, My Friend, Jeremy! I just had a sunrise service of my own here with my son, my nephew, my mom and my step dad. So I decided to take this blessed morning to stop at some of my other friends graves. Its because of today we know you live. Much love and joy, Your former teacher, C

Journal #2 Aug 9, 1999

I thought of you today, my friend
Your smile bright and clear.
I turned to find you in the crowd
Forgetting you're not here.

But today I learned that it's ok
Your memory lives on
And I have learned to thank the Lord
For peace that you are gone.


You know I'm bad at this long distance communication thing, but I still think about you. Know that I love you, M (friend)

Journal #2 Oct 3, 1999

Hi Jer- I really wanted to come see you before this but I didn't know if I could handle it- you are the one friend I could always talk to. One of the best friends I ever had. I love you Jer. See you someday, until then remember even though I didn't always tell you, I do love you and will never forget you.


Love, S (friend)



Are you waiting to tell someone how much you love them?
Don't wait!

Journal #2 Nov 11, 1999

Well- through 2 days of putting off the pain of this visit- I had to be here... It is so hard for me to be away from all of the family when the hurt comes. I try to look around and know that you are with me, and that means there's always family there-


Just wanted to let you know I love you like my own brother, always did, and somehow this has brought me closer to my brother and I thank you for that- I carry you in my heart and soul- and I miss you everyday- A (cousin)



Don't wait for tragedy to strike before reconciling with family.
Let hope, not pain, bring you together.

Journal #2 August 9, 2000

My dad and step mom tell me quit crying and move on, but I feel that if I do, it will be being disrespectful to your memory. The last thing that I would ever want to do is be disrespectful to you. I love you.

Whenever I think of you, I think about when I helped you with your monologue in Theater class, do you remember that? It was the "St Crispan's Day" speech from Shakespeare. I also remember you lip-syncing to "Take Me to Your Leader". I almost cried when I lost the puzzle piece that I got at your funeral. It was the one physical thing that I had to remind me of you. I love you Jeremy. I always will.

Love always, B (a friend)
PS Your black marble headstone is beautiful!


Sometimes grief is confusing. As if by moving on, we're hurting someone we lost. Perhaps you've experienced the confusion -weighing when to move on and let yourself be happy. Grief is so different for everyone- our family knows that very well. Is there any pain in your life you're clinging to? Is it time to let go, and move on? Are you ready for healing?